When the most stifling words in my heart have been spoken, everything else seems less important.
当心中最憋闷的话已经说出口,其它的似乎不太重要了,
Love Letter from Sinosteel Compound IV
October 18, 2021 (Monday) 16:15
I have said most of what I wanted to say to you, and my sleep has improved significantly. I wonder if this has made things more difficult for you than before. You see, that is just how it is—why touch anything else when you can't help but touch feelings? Yet who can escape it? Do not trouble yourself to make any decisions; let nature take its course. If you need to go on blind dates, then go. After all, I wouldn't know, and regardless of who you end up with, just follow your own wishes. For you, perhaps my choice is even harder to decide. I am also thinking, haven't you consulted your parents for advice? The first match I introduced you to was a girl whose father doted on her, but he didn't seem to offer her much guidance in this area. If he had, maybe he would have chosen me. When I was in university, I was an idol among middle-aged and elderly women; the cafeteria aunties would always give me extra food. I don't know why—maybe they saw me as steady in my demeanor or that I never wasted food. But now I am very old, in poor health, and have no money, haha.
中钢大院情书之四
2021年10月18 日(周一) 16点15分
我把想对你说的话大部分都说了,我的睡眠好多了.不知道会不会又让你比之前为难了.你看,就是这样,碰什么不好偏偏碰感情,可是谁又能逃得过去呢.你也不要为难去决定什么,顺其自然吧.需要相亲你就去相亲,反正我也不知道,不管和谁成就,顺从自己的心愿就好.对于你来说,可能我这个选择更难决定.我也在想,你不咨询你父母的意见吗?我第一个介绍的对象就是她爸爸很爱护她,但是好像没有给她这方面什么意见.如果有的话,也许他会相中我.我上大学的时候就是中老年妇女偶像,食堂阿姨都会多给我盛菜.我也不知道为什么,可能看我举止稳重,或者从来不浪费食物.但是现在我已经很老了,身体也不好,也没钱,呵呵.
I also have no intention of using the loss of true love to coerce you into making a decision quickly, even if I had such power. One might use certain tactics when haggling in the market, but those tricks must never be used at home, among family, or with people you care about and cherish. With these people, you can only use sincerity and honesty; otherwise, it won't end well. Also, regarding what I said about the same monthly rent for more mobile data, do not analogize that to people; that is not my principle. Being a Wei Xiaobao would indeed be nice, but I don't seem to have that ability, nor could I afford so many.
我也没有用失去真爱要挟你尽快作出决定的意思,即便我有那样的能力.在市场上讨价还价可以使用一些策略,但是那些伎俩绝不能用到家里,与亲人之间,或者在意,爱护的人,与这些人相处只能是用真心,诚实相对,不然好不了的.还有我说过的同样的月租更多的手机卡,你不要类推到人,那不是我的原则,做韦小宝固然好,但是我好像没那个能力,也负担不了那么多.
Once, a higher being, while communicating with humans, commented that human thoughts are unstable. Perhaps that is the beauty of the mortal world—there is passion and tenderness, reason and emotion. If we were all like them, what would be the point? There was also a time when, while scanning the mind of a communicator, they marveled at such delicate emotions; I don't know if that was a compliment. Let's put the hardest option last. To be honest, I really don't expect to get anything from you; love is love, regardless of whether there is a return. The problem is, I don't have the ability to give you anything either. My daughter cannot swap her own father; actually, she could, but every time I asked, she never said she wanted to live with me. But you still have choices—plenty of them. Perhaps my fate is arranged this way: not allowing me to leave any attachments in this world, so I can complete my task and return. In Chinese, it is called Ye Li; in English, Karma. Actually, Karma is also a loanword, seemingly related to Buddhism.
曾经有高等生命,和人通灵的时候评价人类,说人类的思想不稳定.也许这就是人间的美丽之处吧,有激情也有缠绵,有理智也有感情.如果都跟它们一样,还有什么意思呢.也有一次它们在扫描沟通者思想的时候也感慨,不知道还有这么细腻的感情,不知道是不是恭维之词.把最难的选项放在最后吧,说实话我真的没有期待得到你什么,爱就是爱,不管有没有回报.问题是我也没能力给你什么.我的女儿不能换自己的爸爸,其实也能,几次我问她都不说和我一起生活.而你还有得选,大把的.也许我的命运就是这么安排的,不让我在这世上留下什么牵挂,好完成任务就回去.中文讲叫业力,英文讲叫Karma,其实也是外来词,好像是佛教相关的.
Let me recommend a movie: Carol (2015), starring Cate Blanchett and Rooney Mara. I don't know if you have seen it, but I find it profound and helpful for understanding life. Not to mention, the costumes and makeup are excellent, and the actors are women of great elegance; Rooney has quite the flavor of Audrey Hepburn back in the day.
推荐一个电影吧,2015年的"卡罗尔",凯特布兰切特和鲁尼马拉主演,不知你有没有看过,反正我觉得很深刻,有助于理解人生,其他不说,剧中的服装化妆都不错的,演员也是气质美女,鲁尼颇有当年奥黛丽赫本的味道.
Yours sincerely,
David
你真诚的
David
Love Letter from Sinosteel Compound V
October 20, 2021 (Wednesday) 11:33
My heart periodically becomes uncomfortable, and as I age, it may get worse. Optimistically, technology is also advancing. Whenever this happens, I hesitate because if we were to live together, I wouldn't want you to see me in discomfort and feel depressed. But I am not sure what you consider valuable. Is it flawed perfection or perfect imperfection? Which do you think holds more value? So I cannot just disappear, because I know my understanding of life and this world is better—and I certainly understand myself best. But I do not yet understand you; I do not know what you consider most valuable. I once thought about just vanishing from your world, but I still couldn't do it. I was afraid of hurting you. But given my health, if we lived together, I fear I would make you sad. If you can focus more on the brilliance of a meteor streaking across the night sky rather than obsessing over its fleeting nature, then its beauty will hold more value for you. I am telling you all the factors so you can make the best judgment.
中钢大院情书之五
2021年10月20日 (周三) 11点33分
我的心脏周期性的会不舒服严重一点,随着年龄的增长也许会更差.乐观一点,科技也在进步.一到这时候我就会犹豫,因为如果一起生活,我不希望你看到我不舒服的样子,让你觉得压抑.可是我又不确定你认为什么是有价值的.到底是残缺的完美,还是完美的残缺,你认为更有价值.所以我还不能就此销声匿迹,因为我知道我对人生和这个世界的理解更好,我当然最了解我自己.可是我还不了解你,不知道你认为什么最有价值,曾经我想就那么从你的世界里消失,但是我还是做不到,我怕让你伤心,但是我这样的健康状况,如果和你一起生活,我怕让你难过.如果你能更专注于流星驰彻夜空的灿烂而不纠结于它的转瞬即逝,那么它的美对你来说就更有价值.我把所有因素都告诉你,以便你做出最好的判断.
In reality, this so-called social security and medical insurance are just a way to fool ordinary people. You are young and have little contact with the world, but I can tell you. Any monopolized industry is subject to reverse elimination. Forget society at large; just look at the engineering industry I work in. I see it very clearly: technicians, managers, and industry participants are all ruining this industry together. The medical industry is the same. From my experience with dentists, I have reached the same conclusion: there is a lack of basic professionalism and judgment. What's worse, some club owners come into the medical field to make money, running dental clinics with the same trick as "Paradise on Earth." Even if medical insurance were operable, and I had the money, would I let a whore perform surgery on my heart? It is the same with capital encroachment; without knowledgeable fruit dealers, you can't even buy good, ripe fruit anymore, and agriculture itself is finished.
实际上这的所谓社保医保,不过是糊弄普通老百姓的.你年轻接触这个世界少,但我可以告诉你.只要是垄断性的行业,都是逆淘汰的,这个社会先不说,就说我所在的工程行业,我看得很清楚,不管是技术人员,管理人员,以及行业的参与者,一起把这个行业玩砸了.医疗行业也是一样,从我看牙医的经历也能得出同样的结论,缺乏基本的职业素养和判断力.更有甚不知是哪个会所的老板也来医疗行业赚钱,把牙科诊所开成天上人间一个套路.即便医保有可操作性,我有钱,你说我的心脏能让婊子来做手术吗.同样是资本侵袭,没了懂水果的人经销,好的成熟的水果都买不到了,农业本身更是完蛋.
To talk about something lighter, I noticed you blush when speaking in meetings in front of everyone. I was like that when I was your age. I don't know why; logically, being in your twenties isn't that young. It seemed like you blushed a bit when you had dinner with me that time too. I didn't react at the moment, but later I wondered if it was because... Well, your skin is usually very fair. I am not good at observing others' expressions because I am not sociable; I have little experience in this area, and I have always walked my own path and let others talk, never looking at others' faces. So, I am lacking and slow to react in this regard.
说点轻松的话题,我发现你会脸红,会议室当众发言的时候.我像你那么大的时候也是这样,不知道为什么,按理说二十多岁也不小了.好像你和我一起吃饭那次也有点脸红,我当时没反应过来,后来才想到是不是你当时,,,因为平时你的皮肤很白啊.我不善于观察别人脸色,因为不擅交际,这方面经历本来就少,而且还一向走自己的路让别人去说,从不看别人脸色,所以这方面很欠缺并反应迟钝.
If you are to be with someone in the future, communicate with that person, not others. Other people's opinions are just references. If you don't communicate with the person you want to be with, what basic information will you use to make a decision? Gut feeling? Of course, that works, just don't let your gut feeling change the moment someone else says something. Of course, comparing how he treats you versus how he treats others is also a way to judge. Most importantly, listen to the voice within your heart. What do you truly want? Do you want it persistently? Don't let the plot twist. If this question is hard to answer, ask yourself another way: What are you willing to sacrifice for what you want? Asking yourself this might help you understand yourself more deeply. Because even a three-year-old, if you ask him if he wants love, he will say yes—he thinks love is ice cream. We are no longer children; life is not as simple as a multiple-choice question of what you want.
如果你将来要与谁相处,请与之沟通,而不是别人,别人的意见只是参考.如果你不与想要相处的人沟通,你拿什么基本的信息做决定呢?凭感觉?当然可以,只是不要别人一说什么你的感觉又变了.当然对比一下他对待你什么样,对待别人什么样也是一种判断方式.最重要的是听从自己内心的声音,你到底想要什么.是执着的想要吗?不要剧情反转.如果这个问题不好回答,可以换一个方式问自己.你愿意为了你想要的付出什么?这么问你也许可以更深刻的认识自己.因为即便是三岁孩子你问他,想不想要爱情,他都会说想要,他以为爱情就是冰淇淋呢.
If your heart is strong enough, then listen to its voice. Everything else—what to keep or what to discard—is not a problem. It doesn't matter what others say or how they see it.
如果你的内心足够强大,那么就听从你内心的声音,其他的什么要不要的,都不是问题,别人怎么说,怎么看都没有关系.
Yours sincerely,
David
你真诚的
David
Love Letter from Sinosteel Compound VI
October 20, 2021 (Wednesday) 16:55
These past two days, I have been running around dealing with the appeal. The amazing Lila, who dealt with Zheng Fu, also described it. Once, I thought that if Zheng were gone one day, they should be made to experience what real life is like. But the tone and expression of that junior clerk when she asked if I had submitted the address confirmation gave me a sudden inspiration: perhaps she just lacked proper training, much like the situation in our company. I don't know if this idea came from her, from myself, or from another source; I am puzzled...
中钢大院情书之六
2021年10月20日 (周三) 16点55分
这两天我在跑上诉的事.与郑甫打交道的神奇莱拉也曾描述过.曾经我也想,如果有一天郑没了,应该让他们去体会一下什么是真正的人生.但是那个小办事员当时问我有没有交地址确认的语气和神态让我脑中突然有一个灵感,就是,也许她只是缺乏相应的培训,就像咱公司的情况一样.我不知道这个念头是她给我的还是我自己怎么产生的,还是另外的来源,疑惑中,,,
People have a choice: to understand others with kindness or with malice. But I really don't know when or how such inspiration arrives. Of course, I must emphasize that the world is realistic; one must have sufficient self-protection awareness, especially beautiful women.
人可以选择,以善意的方式去理解人或者以恶意的方式.但是我真的不知道,其中的灵感是怎么或者什么时候会来的.当然我还要强调这个世界是现实的,要有足够的自我保护的防范意识,尤其是美女.
I am not saying this to lean toward the divine or the mystical. Regarding telepathy between people, experiments have indeed been conducted abroad, and it is said that the correlation is higher between couples. I suppose this is also a test of true love. Although I often talk about God and such, I am not that kind of believer; I am different from them. To be honest, I am probably different from the vast majority of people: I am unsociable, I don't echo others, I don't make small talk, I don't play politics or form cliques, I don't chase profits... and I don't pursue the opposite sex. Because I know that beneath a beautiful appearance, the soul is not necessarily beautiful.
我也不是说到什么就又往神或者玄幻上靠,关于人与人之间的心灵感应,国外确实有做过实验,据说情侣之间还相关性偏高.我想这也是考验真爱的一个方式吧.虽然我经常把上帝什么的挂在嘴上,我不是那种信徒,我和他们还不一样.说实话我可能跟绝大多数都不一样,比如不合群,不会附和别人,不闲聊,不搞关系拉帮派,不逐利,,,也不追求异性.因为我知道在美丽的外表之下未必是美丽的心灵.
Since you say nothing, I can only introduce myself. Today, I just had some thoughts and am sending them to you.
你什么也不说,就只有介绍我自己了,今天正好刚才有点感想,发给你.
Yours sincerely,
David
你真诚的
David
Love Letter from Sinosteel Compound VII
October 22, 2021 (Friday) 14:47
I once mentioned my hobby of photography. To prove I am not boasting, I dug out a book of my previous works and am sending it to you as an attachment, inviting you to appreciate it. It is film photography, developed and then scanned. The resolution is not as good as digital, but I love the unique color tone and texture of film.
曾经说过我爱好摄影,为了证明我不是吹牛的,我把之前我做的我的作品的一本书找出来了,作为附件发给你,诚邀赏析.是胶片摄影,洗出照片扫描的.解析度不如数码,但是我喜欢胶片特有的色调和质感.
The camera is a domestic Phoenix, a fully manual SLR. Aperture and focus must be adjusted manually; it is troublesome but fun, and the shooting settings are personalized. Lens zooms are 28–70 and 70–210, with primes at 50 and 85. A whole set of full-frame SLR gear cost less than two thousand yuan, but getting photos developed is a hassle. Now, except for Beijing and Shanghai, you have to search online for that.
相机就是国产凤凰,全手动单反,光圈焦距,都要手动调整,很麻烦也很有趣,并且拍摄设置个性化.镜头变焦28~70,70~210,定焦50和85.全画幅单反一套攒下来不足两千元,就是洗照片费劲,现在除了北京上海,只能上网找了.
Yours sincerely,
David
你真诚的
David
（Translated by Tencent Yuanbao™）