Kōichi and Kazuma jogged through the quiet, luxurious streets of the aristocratic district, finally stopping in front of the imposing Dustiness estate.
"Listen up, Kazuma. In a minute, we're going to describe the Destroyer as the ultimate pervert, a hundred-meter-tall monster covered in tentacles that loves peeling female Knights' armor off piece by piece before pinning them in the mud and grinding them into it." Kōichi lowered his voice, a textbook sadistic grin spreading across his face. "That's the only way Darkness will go scrambling onto the battlefield and plant herself at the very front."
Kazuma gave him a firm thumbs-up, looking completely convinced.
"Got it, big bro! I'll add some details too, like how sticky oil sprays out of the robot's joints and messes up all her hair!"
However, when the heavy gate slowly opened, the person who appeared before them was not the usual masochistic female Knight who turned red and started breathing hard at the mere mention of being ravaged.
Darkness stood quietly in the center of the courtyard, clad in gleaming silver Crusader armor that reflected a cold, solemn light beneath the moon.
She was not wearing that unsettling look of anticipation she usually had. Instead, one hand rested on the hilt of the broadsword at her waist, her eyes blazing, her expression as firm as an immovable mountain.
"Kōichi. Kazuma. You're here."
Darkness's voice was low and powerful, carrying an authority neither of them had ever heard from her before.
She slowly turned around, her cape snapping softly in the breeze.
"I have already learned of the Mobile Fortress Destroyer through my family's intelligence network. It is an ancient weapon that once plunged countless nations into despair. As the acting lord protecting this town, and as the heir to House Dustiness, I will not allow that steel monster to take even half a step into Axel."
Kōichi froze. The long, wicked speech he had prepared about oil, trampling, and torn clothes got stuck in his throat, and he awkwardly swallowed it back down.
"Uh, Lalatina... are you feeling all right? I mean, that monster really is huge, and its feet are extremely rough. Getting stepped on by it would definitely be... very painful, you know?"
Kazuma cautiously tossed out the bait, his eyes full of confusion.
Darkness merely shook her head calmly, her gaze so clear it felt unfamiliar to both of them.
"Pain and humiliation mean nothing compared to the safety of the people. Kōichi, I know you usually enjoy making outrageous jokes, but this is war. I have already gathered the few private soldiers my family has left and prepared all available defensive supplies. No matter how invincible that monster may be, I will stand as Axel's shield and fight to the very end."
She suddenly drew that broadsword of hers, a weapon with tragic accuracy but excellent appearance, and pointed it toward the distant horizon.
"For the glory of the Goddess Eris, and for the people of Axel! I, Darkness, swear to defend this land with my life!"
Kōichi and Kazuma exchanged looks. The air was thick with an awkward atmosphere known as "being serious."
"Kōichi... this isn't right." Kazuma leaned close to Kōichi's ear and whispered in terror, "That perverted female Knight actually turned serious? Isn't this scarier than the Destroyer showing up? Did the pressure get to her so badly that her mental attributes completely flipped?!"
Kōichi looked at Darkness, who appeared sacred and righteous, and the corner of his mouth twitched.
The plan did indeed require a reliable meat shield, but this completely unscripted "true Knight mode" left all the wicked schemes in Kōichi's head with nowhere to go.
"Ahem. Since you're that determined, that's obviously for the best. But... Darkness, are you sure you don't need me to describe the robot's special attack methods in more detail? They're very visually striking, you know?"
Kōichi still refused to give up and tried one last time.
"There is no need for that, Kōichi." Darkness cut him off with righteous conviction, her gaze unwavering. "Even if my armor is shattered, even if I sink into the mud, that is merely the price paid for justice. Please give your orders, Commander!"
Kōichi wiped the cynical, sadistic grin from his face, his expression becoming more solemn than ever.
He looked at Darkness standing heroically in the moonlight, without the slightest trace of her usual indecent aura, and felt something stir faintly in his chest.
He usually mocked her masochistic tendencies, but at this moment, Kōichi truly felt the heavy sense of responsibility hidden beneath the absurd surface of this eldest daughter of a great noble family.
"Since you're that resolved, I won't waste words." Kōichi reached out and gave Darkness's cold, sturdy shoulder guard a firm pat. "Lalatina, I hereby officially appoint you as the Chief Vanguard of the Axel United Defense Force. The lives of every adventurer in this town, along with the homes and families behind them, are now entrusted to your shield."
Darkness's pupils narrowed slightly. Then she straightened her chest and gave him a solemn Knight's salute.
"I shall not fail you, Commander!"
Kazuma Satou stared from the side, dumbfounded, and could not help rubbing his eyes.
"Hey, hey, Kōichi, you're actually getting serious too? What's with this hot-blooded manga development? My urge to make a comeback is about to explode!"
"Shut up, Kazuma. Axel needs this kind of serious power right now." Kōichi lowered his voice, then turned to Darkness. "Let's go, Vanguard Commander. Come with me back to the Adventurers Guild. There's a mob blinded by desire over there, and they need your pure light of justice to physically purify them."
...
When Kōichi returned to the Adventurers Guild with Darkness, who was radiating awe-inspiring righteousness, Dust and the others, who had been pulling each other's hair over a Succubus Voucher, instantly froze.
The silver-haired Knight strode up to the central round table and planted her broadsword heavily against the floor with a dull boom.
"Adventurers! I am Darkness of House Dustiness!" Her voice rang out like a great bell, instantly suppressing the noise in the hall. "I have heard of your resolve to fight for this town, and that is admirable! But if you are fighting only for those... those shallow vouchers, then you are insulting the Adventurer's Medal!"
The adventurers below exchanged uneasy looks. Dust, still clutching a crumpled voucher, awkwardly tried to stuff it into his clothes.
"Listen well! The Destroyer is not an enemy you can defeat by dreaming! From this moment on, all of you will follow a unified tactical plan! I will stand on the front line and block every stomp and impact for you! If anyone dares to retreat on the battlefield, my sword, even if it cannot hit, will show no mercy!"
Watching the adventurers fall so silent under Darkness's authority that they hardly dared to breathe, Kōichi nodded in satisfaction.
He realized that when this woman stopped chasing that perverted thrill, the guardian's aura she gave off was more effective than any motivational tactic.
This woman... when she gets serious, she's actually kind of cool.
Kōichi thought silently to himself, and his original opinion of her as a hopeless pervert quietly gained a faint undertone of respect.