"I am you, but I am not you... Subaru."
The other party gave an answer, but Subaru still couldn't understand what they meant.
"What on earth are you talking about? Where is this place?!"
"This is your inner world, Subaru."
The person who looked exactly like her spoke calmly to Subaru, "I was born because of you. But I am different from that person outside. I only exist within your heart. You and I are one, Subaru. I am your 'heart'."
Under Subaru's gaze, she slowly approached, her voice like a whisper as she spoke inexplicable words, "Hurry and remember... what exactly happened that day. Once you remember, you'll be able to accept me, won't you?"
—
"You disgusting thing!"
Fragments of memory suddenly pierced into her mind.
It was an abandoned, unfinished building; the air was thick with the smell of dust and rust.
A blonde girl grabbed Subaru's hair with force and slammed her against the rough concrete floor. Her cheek rubbed against the cold, coarse ground, sending a searing sting through her. Her skin was left with streaks of bleeding abrasions.
It wasn't just the blonde girl, several others stood around, watching coldly.
"If I'm late getting back... Mom will worry..."
Subaru curled her body up, not struggling, only murmuring in a low voice.
She seemed already numb to such bullying, this was the only thought left in her head.
"You bastard!"
Amidst an angry roar, a kick slammed into her abdomen. Subaru let out a muffled groan, her body curling up in pain.
"You... don't deserve to have parents! You should just go die!"
Just as the blonde girl raised her foot to continue the beating, someone nearby whispered a discouragement, "Hey... let's leave it for today. It'll be bad if things get out of hand. She definitely won't say anything."
"What do you mean 'leave it'?!"
The blonde girl whipped her head around, her eyes fierce. "Do you want a taste of it too? If not, then shut up!"
After scaring off the person who tried to stop her, she pulled a folding fruit knife from her pocket. The blade glinted coldly in the dim light. She walked step by step toward Subaru, who was lying on the ground.
"As long as I scar your face... no! As long as I turn you into a cripple, no one will ever like you again. Hahahaha..."
Her voice trembled with excitement, her eyes filled with twisted jealousy. "Only then will everyone's gaze return to me, instead of on a gloomy monster like you. Kiyotaka will too... So..."
She crouched down, the blade approaching Subaru's cheek.
"You are the source of all misfortune, Subaru!!!"
The sharp tip of the knife was about to pierce the skin—
(Why don't we just kill them all?)
A cold, alien voice echoed deep within Subaru's mind without warning.
(It's okay to do so. No one will blame you.)
"No... no." Subaru shook her head frantically in her heart, resisting with all her might.
Even so, the chill of the blade had already touched her skin.
'Perhaps... this is what's normal?'
A desperate thought spread through her heart like poisonous weeds.
'As a 'monster', being treated like this is only natural, right?'
(Then let me grant you a gift, Subaru.)
The moment the voice fell, Subaru's vision seemed to be covered by an illusory veil. She looked down, and a cold, solid metallic sensation came from her hands. It was a shotgun.
"That's right."
She murmured to herself, her voice carrying a strange certainty, "I am a hunter... that's right, I am a hunter."
Amidst repeated self-affirmations, she raised the shotgun. In front of the muzzle, a wild boar was shivering and shrinking into a corner.
"A hunter should be like this, right?"
Bang!
Fire spat from the muzzle, and the roar of the gunshot exploded. The bullet hit the wild boar's hind leg, and blood splattered. But the wild boar didn't run. Instead, it collapsed to the ground out of extreme fear, letting out a wail.
Bang!
Noticing the "mistake" of the first shot, an unnervingly joyful smile appeared on Subaru's face as she pulled the trigger for the second time. The bullet precisely entered the wild boar's chest.
After the second shot, the wild boar let out a piercingly shrill scream—a sound that, vaguely, sounded like a human's wail.
"Not enough... still far from enough."
That wretched cry seemed to ignite a cold excitement within Subaru. The calm expression on her face vanished, replaced by a near-frenzied joy.
She casually tossed the shotgun onto the ground and drew the machete from her back, gripping it tightly.
In the reflection of the wild boar's pupils, which were dilated with pain and fear, Subaru took a step forward. Her steps were somewhat staggering, yet she let out a laugh that was excitingly hair-raising.
"Hahaha... Hahahahaha! It... it's so good, so comfortable. This is how it should be, right? It... it's truly comfortable!"
Puff!
Accompanied by maniacal laughter, the machete in her hand fell ruthlessly.
One strike, then another.
Severing limbs.
Draining the blood.
Slicing off the flesh piece by piece...
Taking out the internal organs bit by bit to admire their beauty.
The wild boar's screams, the mad laughter, the sound of flesh being carved—they composed an incomparably beautiful symphony.
—
"Blegh!!!"
Suffocating memories surged into her mind like a tide.
Subaru's pupils trembled violently in their sockets, and her stomach cramped fiercely. She bent over and vomited uncontrollably, as if trying to purge that twisted memory along with her soul.
And the perpetrator of all this—the other "her" simply stood calmly to the side. There was even a trace of a gentle smile on her face as she quietly watched the agonizing Subaru.
"The difference between you and me lies in..."
Her voice rose steadily, piercing through Subaru's painful gasps, "I am the 'Subaru' who chose to negate everything in order to 'keep myself from being hurt'. And you are the 'Subaru' who chose to affirm everything in order to 'protect others'."
'Subaru' tilted her head slightly and continued, "Actually, it doesn't matter which one is 'correct'. It's just that our personalities were split too distinctly. After all, although we together constitute a complete 'individual', we have always been isolated from each other."
"This is us—Subaru. In medicine, it would be called Dissociative Identity Disorder, right?"
Looking at this existence before her eyes—one she didn't know if she could call a "person"—Subaru endured the surging pain and nausea, screaming with all her strength, "Stop joking around!!! You... you demon!!!"
Her angry shout caused the 'Subaru' on the side to startle slightly, but she immediately continued speaking in a calm tone, "A sound body carries a sound soul. From this stems a sound personality—this is what is called a 'human'."
She paused for a moment before continuing smoothly, as if stating a theorem, "I was born at Subaru's most painful and desperate moment. And the one who keeps 'me' running is also Subaru. The one who truly wanted to kill them all was also Subaru."
"No... no! Impossible!!!" Subaru shook her head violently, refusing to admit it.
"Impossible?"
The other party chuckled. "Hehe. People who like their own form will develop an extroverted, social personality. Those who loathe their own form tend to form an introverted, gloomy personality. In other words..."
She took a step forward, looking down at Subaru, who had collapsed on the ground.
"Neither you nor I are the original 'host personality' of this body. The two of us are nothing more than two fragments split from the personality named 'Subaru'. But we are both Subaru."
"What... are you saying?" Subaru's voice began to tremble.
"The one truly in full control of 'us' is that 'Subaru'—the 'Subaru' who hid away completely in order to never be hurt again."
Her voice was like a cold, thin stream. "However, even if we split into two different personalities, the foundation of our thinking is still unified. It is precisely because of this that we have been able to 'survive' until now."
Looking at the girl who was speechless from shock, that "Subaru" slowly crouched down to look her in the eye. Then, she reached out her hand, her fingertip hovering gently in front of Subaru's pupil.
"Do you know why I have never actively seized control of the body?" She asked softly.
By now, Subaru was unable to speak, only able to stare wide-eyed at her other self.
"That's because..."
The hovering fingertip pressed down slightly, almost touching the eyelashes.
"The world outside is so boring, so sickening. Just thinking about facing such a world makes me unable to stop myself from wanting to kill everyone."
The moment the words fell, her finger suddenly jabbed forward.
Puff!
"AAAAAAAHHHHHHH!!!"
Intense pain accompanied by a darkness mixed with red instantly swallowed Subaru's vision, and the sensation of agony immediately spread through her entire body.
In the final moment before her consciousness completely sank into nothingness, the last thing to reach her ears was that familiar, cold whisper.
(Then... let me grant you another gift, Subaru.)