Rhenvar sank slowly, drifting deeper into the black abyss. His thoughts and consciousness were sluggish. The dark felt peaceful, warm and homely.
Where… am… I?
Silence.
So… the seal must've broken.
I wonder if I hurt anyone.
I probably did.
…I'm sorry Willow.
He let himself drift; the void around him thick yet soft. His limbs felt heavy no, they were gone. He was just a red star now. Just drifting.
Why did I think of Willow just now? It's not like I'll ever see him again. Do I care? …I don't know. There's no guarantee saving worlds will bring him back.
Maybe it's better to forget him.
But how could I? He matters to me. And Sylvia… our friendships. Our memories together.
It's all gone.
His thoughts spiraled.
This kinda hurts, now that I think about it. It's painful. Maybe when I wake up I should just eat everyone-
"It's been a while, my son," a voice echoed, soft and strange.
Rhenvar's soul shuddered.
"…Who?"
"You really did a number on yourself with my magic," the voice chided. "Didn't I tell you to be careful?"
That voice. Familiar. Mocking. Playful.
"…Mother?"
The Goddess of Chaos. Viir's mother. The one who cursed him with soul consuming chaos magic.
"And here I thought you forgot about me!" Her voice danced with mischief.
"How could I? You started this whole cosmic mess," Rhenvar muttered.
"Doesn't this feel familiar?" Her voice soothed him.
"Where are you? Where am I?" He said looking around.
"Oh, I'm here. You're inside me, technically."
"…Ew."
"Oh, don't be like that, sweetie," she cooed mockingly.
"Wait, how are you even here? I killed you. Ate what was left of your soul."
Chaos chuckled. "Still as stupid as ever. For someone who inherited my power, the power to consume souls, all that stolen power and memories, yet you really don't get how any of this works."
"You didn't answer the question."
"You used my power to devour me. And you thought that was enough to end me?" She laughed. "My poor son. I'm hurt that you lost faith in your dear old mom."
Rhenvar sighed. "Cut the games. What's happening?"
"Well," she said sweetly, "your soul's been consumed. Welcome to where consumed souls go."
"…There's nothing here."
"Exactly. Just you. And me."
"Damn. So, when I eat souls… they don't get reincarnated?"
"Of course not. That would defeat the whole point of consuming them."
"…Yeah. Guess I really am a monster, huh." Rhenvar laughed.
"Are you?"
"Of course I am."
"Then let's find out." She said.
A flash of crimson light swallowed him.
****
Rhenvar's memories.
He saw himself, wandering through a quiet black forest bathed in red moonlight.
"Is this… Goldensun Woods?"
Chaos's voice hummed softly. "You have come here many times. What did it remind you of?"
"Home," he muttered. "It reminded me of something lost, something from back then. Before everything. Peaceful. Safe. Fun."
Rhenvar watched as his memory self-approached an elven boy curled into a ball beneath a tree; he was crying. Willow's long golden hair spilled over his knees, his body trembling slightly.
"Hey," Rhenvar's echo said softly.
"Oh… Rhen." Willow didn't look up.
"Mind if I sit?"
Willow said nothing.
"Too bad. I'm sitting anyway."
The silence between them stretched until Willow finally asked, "Rhen… do you love my sister?"
Rhenvar blinked. "Huh? I don't know. I think I love her."
"Oh…"
"Hey, it's not like that, I swear." Rhenvar let out a nervous laugh, then added, quieter, "I love you too, you know."
He threw an arm around Willow's shoulders and pulled him in close.
"Why does love hurt so much, is it wrong?" Willow whispered.
Rhenvar sighed.
"Because love is powerful. Sometimes it's mutual. Sometimes it's not. Sometimes… it's not even a choice. It can destroy, or it can heal. It can devour or save." He looked out at the forest. "Some say it breaks even the strongest wills. Others say it conquers all."
Rhenvar held him tighter. "In the end… love isn't fair. But that doesn't mean it's wrong."
Willow slowly looked up at him, tears running down his cheeks. There was something raw and unfamiliar in his expression, like he was seeing Rhenvar for the first time. Like he looked into his soul.
He leaned against Rhenvar. They didn't speak again. They just… sat there. Together. In the red moonlit forest.
"Are you truly a monster?" Chaos said.
"Ok, first of all… That was necessary. He was hurting. Second, it was muscle memory, that's exactly what I would have said in that moment if I had my soul."
"The lies you tell yourself dig you deeper in the darkness, digging yourself deeper than the abyss you currently reside." Chaos mocked.
"…"
****
Rhenvar blinked.
He was sitting at a table. A kitchen table.
My house? I'm back on Htrae? No fucking way!
He jolted upright, scanning the room. His heart twisted at the familiarity. A dog's head poked up from the floor, tail thumping.
"Knil?" He whispered, dropping to his knees. "Knil! My best boy!" He threw his arms around the dog, burying his face in its fur.
Chaos stood nearby, now visible, pale white skin, a black cloak obscuring her face, a veil with a sinister grin hidden beneath.
"How do you feel?" She asked crossing her arms. "Do you remember this far back?"
"Hell yeah I remember how could I forget- wait, how did I forget my real life? Before all this bullshit, even my home."
"Well living for over a thousand years isn't exactly healthy for the human mind." Chaos floated near him.
"If I remember this, that means my seal really broke… My soul is free."
"Yes. And now you're consumed," she said caressing his cheek. "Exciting, isn't it?"
Rhenvar slapped her hand away. "I'm having the time of my life."
Another flash.
****
Rhenvar stood, watching a past version of himself, drunk, sobbing, fumbling upstairs.
"Wow," he muttered. "I cried a lot, huh?"
Chaos smiled. "Remember the first sentient life you took? You cried for hours."
"Self-defense," he shot back. "You threw me into that world. What choice did I have?"
"Let's watch."
The echo of Rhenvar stumbled into his bedroom, pulling something from a drawer.
"First Nasoj, now you. I hic-Knil, why did hic you die too? I have nothing."
The memories turned black.
"I did love that dog…," present-day Rhenvar muttered. "This was around the time my friend Nasoj died from cancer, now that I remember it. I was a mess."
"That's why I chose you," Chaos said poking his chest. "So much chaos in your heart."
Then she gently caressed his hair. "Your mind was a storm."
Then she hugged him. "You are my heart and soul."
"I was just depressed, looking for any reason to hold on. It wasn't my fault; I didn't want to die but- "
"But it called to you, didn't it?" She whispered in his ear. "Death."
"I still don't know why," he hugged her back. "Those thoughts weren't mine. It's not like my life back then sucked."
"Were you happy?"
"I was content."
"You run from your problems, Rehpotsirhc." She pushed him away. "Ignore them, and fight them when they catch you."
Chaos cupped Rhenvar's face in her hands. "You are perfect."
"I forgot how overly affectionate you can be-"
"Why shouldn't I be?" She brushed his cheek. "You killed my siblings. Claimed my domain. You wore my armor. Wield my sword. Became my dragon. You'll always be my perfect champion."
"What's so great about that?"
"It's entertaining!"
She let go and stood by his side as they watched more scenes, years, decades, and centuries. The day he devoured his first Worldheart.
"Huh." Rhenvar said, voice confused. "Am I missing something? Some of the memories after I ate that Skeleton King guy were a blur."
Chaos laughed. "So, you did not see it, how cute."
"Whatever, mom. So why did I do it anyway?"
"A memory hidden by divine magic, it's best to keep it that way. You'd snap again if you remembered her."
"Her?"
Chaos gestured. "Look."
A new memory unfolded: Rhenvar drinking tea with the Goddess of Darkness. His eyes were hollow; his soul fractured but still his usual self. This was the day he struck the deal to carry her power. The day he sacrificed a piece of himself.
"I need you as a weapon, Rehpotsirhc, I could over time find a way to restore your world." Darkness looked up at him. "Is that what you want?"
"Yeah, I think I would like to restore it." Rhenvar's echo said. "But the more I think about that world there's nothing left."
Rhenvar stiffened. Then focused.
"If you help me, I'll help you. So, what do you need?" Darkness asked.
"I need to forget everything. I want to forget her; it still hurts. Even my sealed soul is thrashing at her memory. I don't think it'll last. You play with a dangerous weapon, Goddess."
"I can help you forget; I'll give you some of my power, bind your sealed soul to me, so you won't have to rely on the Goddess of Chaos' magic."
"Why should I trust you?" He sneered. "All of you Gods are the same, bored, pathetic- "
Shadows around Rhenvar choking him.
"You are a Worldeater, so killing you would make sense Rehpotsirhc, our trust goes both ways. Not all Gods are the same, did you think I was entertained watching my sister die?"
She released him.
"Fine- " he said coughing. "Make me forget her and it's a deal."
Darkness grinned.
"Now, allow me into your Chaos Temple, where the source is strongest." She reached out her hand.
His echo grabbed it and they vanished in a flash of red light.
"Oh!" Chaos chirped. "I watched that ritual. Oh, I bet you forget it."
"What happened?" Present Rhenvar asked.
"As if I'd spill a woman's secret, as much as I despise that weakling."
They continued to watch the memory after the flash of red light returned them to the black stone table.
"And with that ring, we are bound. My siblings will approve of you living in our world."
Rhenvar looked at the ring on his finger.
"So, I can use your magic?" Rhenvar's echo asked.
"Yes, although it's nothing like the soul magic you use but it has its uses. It can be quite powerful if you master it."
"Badass."
"You take cosmic bargains remarkably well," She waved her hand. "Now off you go, and don't leave the Shadowfort."
Rhenvar disappeared and so did the memory.
****
"That damn ring… The same fucking ring that got Sylvia killed." Present-Rhenvar said.
"I'm still upset you willingly allowed yourself to be leashed. Like a dog."
"It was that or spend another few thousand years in the chaos temple. So what's so great about the ring now?"
"She still has part of your soul," Chaos whispered. "That's why you can't be consumed. Not fully. Not yet. And I was so close to having you."
"…So?"
"So, call to her."
Rhenvar raised an eyebrow. "You want me to call to Darkness?"
"Provoke her with something, lewd!" Chaos giggled.
That's how you want me to get her attention? So weird.
He smirked. "Alright… YO DARKNESS! BET YOU'RE SMOKING HOT UNDER THOSE SHADOWS!"
The shadows cracked.
****
Darkness's Tea Table.
"Rhenvar! You dare insult me; do you want to die!" Darkness said before she shifted.
"Rhenvar?!" The voice was sharp. Surprised.
"Darkness! Is that you?" He floated in her realm again, a weightless red star.
"Yes, wait. What in all the worlds are you? You have no body!"
"…What do I look like?"
"A red, pulsing star. Oh…"
"Yeah. It's not ideal to just float around as a soul. Can you send me back?"
She hesitated, then sighed. "I can, given our connection."
She waved her hand.
****
The Palace Prison.
Rhenvar gasped awake.
Alive.
Returned.
But something had changed.
He felt it… his soul had returned. And his emotions and memories with it.