New Chaldea – Staff Cafeteria, 8:00 a.m.
The cafeteria of New Chaldea was both the central hub for information exchange and a breeding ground for rumors.
When Steve walked in carrying a plate of standard English breakfast (though personally modified by Emiya), a faint tension rippled through the air.
He wore his usual gentle, approachable smile as he walked straight toward the most conspicuous table in the room.
Seated there were Chaldea's core members: Mash, Ophelia, Da Vinci Lily, and… Fujimaru.
The girl currently had her face buried in a bowl of porridge, as if trying to disguise herself as an ostrich.
"Good morning, everyone."
Steve naturally took the empty seat opposite Ritsuka and gracefully picked up a sausage with his fork.
"Today's sausages are grilled to perfection. Emiya must be in a good mood."
"Pff—! Cough, cough, cough!"
The moment Ritsuka heard Steve's voice, she choked on her porridge like a cat that had its tail stepped on.
She coughed violently, her face flushing bright red as her panicked gaze darted back and forth between Steve and the bowl in front of her. She didn't dare look up at him.
"Senpai? Are you all right?"
Mash hurriedly put down her utensils and gently patted Ritsuka's back, her amethyst eyes full of concern.
"You've been restless since earlier… Did you not sleep well last night?"
"N-no! I slept great! Super great! I didn't see anything weird, and I didn't hear any strange sounds at all!"
Ritsuka denied it at once, but in trying to conceal the truth, she looked as if someone had slapped a label on her forehead that read: "I know a major secret."
Sitting beside her, Ophelia tilted her head in puzzlement.
Once a member of Team A and only recently joined to Chaldea, she clearly wasn't used to the lively atmosphere here yet.
Through her right eye (the one covered by an eyepatch), she cast a brief glance at Ritsuka, then at the composed Steve, and asked in a low voice:
"A strange phenomenon…? Are you referring to some kind of unobserved ether reaction? Or is there some sort of invisible spiritual interference occurring within Chaldea?"
"My, Ophelia, you're so pure."
Da Vinci Lily swung her legs idly under the chair, her eyes brimming with wisdom (and gossip) as they flicked between Steve and Ritsuka.
A mischievous smile curled her lips.
"The strange thing Ritsuka mentioned is probably a grown-up problem, right?"
"For example… a secret early-morning rendezvous?"
"Waaahhh! Da Vinci-chan, what are you talking about?!"
Ritsuka let out a wail and nearly curled up under the table.
Mash's expression instantly turned serious. It seemed that as a Shielder, her instincts had locked onto a crisis signal labeled impure relationship.
She turned her head and fixed a steady gaze on Steve.
"Mr. Steve… May I ask what exactly happened?"
Facing Mash's gaze—like some kind of chastity examination—and also Director Gordolf's curious stare from nearby, Steve calmly swallowed his food and dabbed his mouth with a napkin.
He knew that denying it at this point would only make things worse. But if he admitted it, that would be the same as confirming his relationship with Sion.
And that was precisely what he was desperately trying to avoid.
He did have feelings for Sion.
The awkward, rational cuteness buried deep in her logical mind was undeniably adorable.
However…
Steve's eyes happened to land on the quietly smirking Da Vinci Lily, and at the same time, an image rose unbidden in his mind: a loli-like figure glowing with maternal radiance (such as a young Tiamat).
When he came into this world, besides the great mission of saving humanity, his deepest, most secret wish had been to find a motherly—small, cute, and warm—who would hold him and heal him.
If he were to officially become a couple with Sion now, that would mean giving up the entire forest for the sake of a single tree.
Throughout his life, he had firmly upheld the principle of chastity and vehemently rejected the idea of becoming a playboy. But as long as there was no established romantic relationship, his current flirtatious behavior could be classified as nothing more than broad social field research, and absolutely not cheating.
This was men's (distorted) romance!
Steve showed a flawlessly scholarly smile.
"It's nothing serious."
He shrugged, speaking casually.
"As you all know, Sion is the very definition of a workaholic and data maniac."
"This morning, she suddenly developed a sort of academic'curiosity about my magic circuits. She insisted on taking close-range measurements during the time when my magical activity is normally at its peak in the morning."
"A perfectly fitting… physical measurement?"
Mash was stunned.
"Yes. After all, I'm a Heroic Spirit from a parallel world, so my structure is somewhat different from the Servants here."
"As a technical advisor, it's only natural for Sion to want to collect the data herself, right? That said, her approach was a little too forceful. She barged into my room without warning…"
Steve sighed, looking rather helpless.
"And it just so happened that Ritsuka walked in on that."
"This girl is a bit shy and might have misunderstood, thinking we were doing something improper. But it was just a routine 'magical transmission test.'"
"Is… that so?"
Mash blinked. She had a vague sense that something was off, but Steve's explanation was just too straightforward—and given Sion's usual anything in the name of research attitude—it did seem plausible.
Eh? Seriously?
Ritsuka raised her head from the bowl, her face blank.
Was that really just a test? But that pose at the time was clearly…
"Exactly."
Steve gave Ritsuka a quick wink, his eyes plainly asking her to "help cover up the lie."
"Ritsuka, what you saw then was just Sion putting her hand on my chest—on my magic circuit core—right?"
"Ah… y-yes, yes!"
Ritsuka picked up the signal. Racked by guilt but desperate to avoid making things more awkward, she could only nod frantically.
"Y-yeah… measurements! Extremely professional measurements!"
"See?"
Steve spread his hands.
"It was just a purely academic mishap."
"Oh my… an academic mishap, is it?"
Da Vinci Lily drawled the words out with meaningful emphasis. It was obvious she didn't believe a word of it, but she also wasn't foolish enough to expose them outright. She only smiled and said:
"Well then, next time Sion runs that kind of experiment, don't forget to call me, okay?"
"I'm very interested in the structural composition of Steve's body too…"
The crisis was temporarily averted.
Steve mentally made a peace sign.
…
New Chaldea – Maintenance Access Corridor C, 9:15 a.m.
After breakfast, in order to completely eliminate any potential problems, Steve gave Ritsuka a quick wink, signaling her to come with him.
One after the other, the two of them slipped into a rarely used maintenance corridor.
"Whew… That really scared me."
As soon as they stepped into the corridor, Ritsuka exhaled in relief, leaned back against the wall, and patted her chest.
"Mr. Steve, that was way too close back in the cafeteria! I thought Mash was going to start interrogating us!"
"Sorry for dragging you into this."
Steve gave her an apologetic smile and stepped closer.
"But I do need to explain this morning's events to you alone."
"Sion might have had… certain feelings involved, but I didn't feel that way—"
"It's fine! I get it! I totally get it!"
Ritsuka quickly waved her hands, putting on a knowing smile.
"The adult world is always full of all kinds of… you know… passion, right?"
"As long as you and Sion are happy, I'll absolutely keep my mouth shut!"
"No, you don't understand at all."
Steve pinched the bridge of his nose. A slight headache was coming on.
Why is this girl so deeply corrupted by doujin culture?
"Let me put it this way: Sion and I are not dating… at least not for now."
"So what happened this morning really was just an accident…"
"Eh? You're not dating?"
Ritsuka was at a loss for words for a moment, then looked even more shocked.
"But the two of you are so obviously… Don't tell me it's one of those non-official physical relationships?!"
"Stop! Wait! Your imagination is running completely out of control!"
Steve reflexively reached out and gave her forehead a light flick, as if to snap her out of it.
But at that exact moment—
The so-called "Lucky Pervert," or perhaps more accurately, the malicious force known as World Correction, suddenly descended.
On the floor of the maintenance corridor was a small pool of lubricating oil left behind from when Meunière had been fixing the pipes.
Ritsuka's Chaldea-issue boots, designed with mobility in mind, landed right on the edge of that slick.
"Wah?!"
Ritsuka let out a short cry as her foot slipped, her body pitching backward beyond her control.
Behind her was a messy pile of metal pipes.
If she fell like that, she was guaranteed to get hurt.
"Careful!"
Steve's reaction was lightning fast. Thanks to his Heroic Spirit-level physical abilities, he made his decision in an instant.
He lunged forward, snaked his right arm around Ritsuka's waist, and yanked her back toward him.
However, the combined force of her inertia and the slippery floor threw Steve off balance as well.
To keep them from tumbling onto the floor and rolling like a pair of tumbleweeds, he twisted his body sharply as they fell and braced his free hand against the wall.
Thud!
A dull impact echoed through the narrow corridor.
Time froze.
If one were to use shoujo manga terminology to describe their pose at this moment, it would be a textbook example of the ultimate "kabe-don."
Steve had one hand pressed against the wall, and his other arm was wrapped firmly around Ritsuka's slender waist, pinning her securely between himself and the wall.
Because of the impact, their bodies were almost completely pressed together.
Still rattled, Ritsuka's eyes went wide, and she instinctively grabbed a fistful of Steve's shirt.
Their faces were less than five centimeters apart.
Steve was so close he could see the fine peach fuzz on Ritsuka's cheeks, and Ritsuka could feel the warmth of his breath brushing the tip of her nose.
"Are you all right?"
Steve asked quietly.
At this distance, his voice sounded especially low and magnetic.
"N-no, I'm fine… I'm totally fine…"
Ritsuka's brain had gone completely offline.
The pleasant, masculine scent clinging to Steve surrounded her, and the warmth of his large hand through her uniform at her waist felt as if it were setting her skin on fire.
Her heart was pounding wildly, as if it might leap out of her throat.
…This is bad.
Steve silently cursed that accursed lubricating oil.
He was about to let go and step back, to explain that it was nothing more than a physical accident.
But just then—
From the end of the corridor came a faint, brittle sound. Something had cracked.
Click.
It was the sound of reason shattering.
Steve and Ritsuka both froze.
As if compelled by some ominous premonition, they slowly, mechanically turned their heads toward the corridor entrance.
A purple-haired figure stood there.
Sion.
She had two cans of hot coffee in her hands, freshly purchased from a vending machine. She had originally planned to use them to apologize to Steve.
But now, both cans slipped from her hands and hit the floor, brown liquid slowly spreading across the ground.
Sion stood there in silence. Her expression was eerily calm.
The light of intelligence and rationality that usually shone in her eyes had vanished without a trace.
In its place was a bottomless, pitch-black abyss.
She looked at the two of them, still frozen in their kabe-don pose.
She looked at Steve's hand, wrapped around Ritsuka's waist.
She looked at their faces, almost touching.
This morning in bed, he had told himself, "It was just an accident."
At noon, he told everyone in the cafeteria, "It was just an academic test."
And now, in this deserted corner, he had the young, adorable Master of Chaldea pinned against the wall.
"…I see."
Sion's voice was as soft as a summer breeze, yet cold enough to freeze the soul.
"Is this also… a magic transfer test, Mr. Steve?"
At that moment, Steve was sure he saw it.
Behind Sion, a dark aura seemed to materialize, like the ultimate weapon of the Atlas Institute, or the final boss Nightmare of the Bird of Hades from Tsukihime.
We're doomed.
Steve sighed inwardly.
This time, not even Lie 800 would be enough to fix things.
…
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