Alistair stood before me, wearing a look of contempt, as if he had better things to do than pay me a visit.
"Well?" He prompted, a hint of impatience in his voice,
"In case you hadn't noticed, you're in my home, Mr. Grant." I stood firmly on both feet, despite the urge to keel over. Upon my response, he'd looked at me as if I'd said something purely outrageous.
"Rowena Dravenhart." He rebuked, sending a fearful chill down my spine, making me subconsciously shudder. He'd barked my name countless times in that manner—that godforsaken tone, like I was a misbehaving child."Need I remind you that you proposed to me? And yet, I have to come here to seek you out."
I pulled the loose skin on my bottom lip between my teeth. "You're right." I nodded to myself, internally cursing my younger self for her aggressive manner. "However, since then, I've taken some time to think." Alistair continued to be unamused by me, as if he expected some bullshit to come out of my mouth.
"Rowena, you bore me with your antics." He pinched the bridge of his nose frustratedly. "What do you want from me?" His tone was becoming increasingly agitated. "Is it not enough that I've accepted your proposal and left Evelina?" I met his words with a blank stare.
"Alist-" I sighed.
"-Why is nothing ever enough for you?!" His outburst echoed through the room as he stepped dangerously closer than my comfort wished. Out of instinct, my arms came up to shield me from an expectant strike, but I quickly my actions and pulled my hands down, smoothening my dress. Alistair, on the other hand saw me flinch and took a reassuring step back but with a disgusted look on his face. "Is this a new ploy of yours? To pretend like a victim in order to gain sympathy?"
I scoffed to myself before letting out an audible chuckle.
-1 year after Rowena's marriage to Alistair
"Did you hear?" A maid, older, whispered to the younger one as she folded the loose bedding sheet.
"Hear what?" The younger one inquired, inching closer to the older one.
"Duke Grant brought Evelina home as a mistress last night." A few maids around them gasped as they widened their eyes at each other.
I stood with my back against the corridor wall, listening quietly to what they had to say. That was the only way I'd know anything around here, considering that I was ostracized but everyone, including staff.
"Neither the Duke or the woman slept, quite the scandal if you ask me." She sighed, aggressively patting the folded sheet. "I feel rather bad for the Duchess."
"I mean what did she expect-"
"-Lower your voice!" The older maid cut the other off before she spoke her mind out loud, for that kind of thing could get her killed.
"What did she think would happen she forcing a man into a marriage that he didn't want?"
I knew, thought it took me a while I've known. I don't know if it's because in 1 year he's shattered my entire world.
Lulia is gone.
My father's business was in ruins, and he killed himself.
I've begged and begged Alistair to help him. But that was when I found out that he was the reason for his business failing.
I did this all to myself, I know.
I placed a hand on my stomach, stroking the slight bump that barely poked through under my dress.
No one knows, and I've yet to tell Alistair. But I'm carrying his love, or whatever little he had left for me.
-
I returned to my chambers to rest but Alistair was sitting on my bed, as if he'd been waiting for me.
"I'm sure you've heard." His voice fell upon the heavy silence that took place. But I said nothing. "She will be staying here as my mistress."
I still stayed silent.
"You've nothing to say?" He stood to his feet, staring me down with a challenging look.
"I don't care what you do with that bitc-" before the word left my lips, a sharp pain met my cheek. I stumbled from the impact, but what more, was the metallic taste in my mouth.
The tears burned my eyes, but I held them back. This wasn't the first time, and it certainly wouldn't be the last but my crying seemed to encourage him to keep going, like I owed him that power.
-End
My heart burned and I quickly swallowed the lump in my throat, thinking about the my life with him.
And my baby-
My poor baby.
A few months later, I lost him from the stress that I endured when my mother passed. I know she looks after him wherever they are. But upon finding out that I was pregnant, and had miscarried, Alistair laughed in face, and tormented me for months. That so in unspeakable ways, till eventually my body was rendered uninhabitable for a fetus.
Looking at his face now, I felt nothing but seething hate. I will avenge my unborn baby and my parents.
"Do you intend to stand here staring at me forever?" His held his arms out and dropped them to his sides like it was too heavy to hold up.
"I've decided that I needed to reevaluate my choice, and our your union would be a mistake." I crossed my arms over my chest, holding my head up high. The look on Alistair's face was almost homicidal, not that I care why. "I'm relieving you, you're welcome to marry who you please." I curtsied and started for the door. As I placed my hand on the door knob, a hand slammed against the door beside my head, startling me into turning back around.
"You're despicable." He gritted through his teeth, getting dangerously close. "I don't know what you're playing at, but I'm not falling for it." He pulled back and reached for the door. "And don't think I'll come to you next time." With that he left the room slammed the door after him.
I felt a sudden burst of embarrassment in my gut, that I actively fell in love with a man like him. I couldn't help but laugh to myself.
My laughing ceased when I realized that my marriage to Lucian has to happen. This man certainly needs a lot of time to think about whether to marry me or not.
I'm not that undesirable am I?
Though its shunned upon to appear at the King's palace without notice, I fear that the prince might run upon hearing of my arrival.
I exited the waiting room to call upon Lulia to find her already waiting outside with her thumb nail between her teeth.
When she saw me and my face, the colour returned to her face. It was almost as if she didn't expect me to look as put together as I did. "M'lady?" She quickly fixed her expression and wiped her hand on her skirt.
"We're going to the King's Palace." I walked ahead, but she scurried to catch up to me.
"Do you really think that's a good idea, M'lady?" She questioned, but I kept walking, not really knowing the answer to her question. "What if.." Her voice trailed off but she was still behind me. I stopped where I was and turned around to look at her.
"What if I become obsessed with the Prince?" I finished her question, gaining a panicked look on her face. "I know my past experiences aren't very telling of good romantic history. My alliance with the Prince is purely for survival purposes." I sighed to myself as I envisioned a bright future for myself where I live a long life. "But you might be right, I'll just wait a few more days and be patient-"
-Days later
Before I knew it I was stood in front of Lucien, but he was working, and he barely spared me a glance. I couldn't believe this man had me come to him after he gave me ZERO response. But I couldn't help but feel like he was waiting for me to seek him out.
I stood in front of the door, awkwardly shifting the weight between my feet. The silence was deafening and I was beginning to lose my patience.
The scribbling of his pen against the documents continued, its suspension was not in sight. As Lucian reached for the next document to review, my body moved before I could process what my plan was going to be.
I slammed a hand down on the hefty stack of documents. Though I panicked internally, I stayed there, remaining dedicated to my impulse.
For a split second I could almost see a slight smirk tug at Lucien's lips but he stopped it before it widened further. He looked at me, his eyes moved first, before his face. "I've yet to hear your response, Your Highness." I gritted through an irritated smile.
"I will need a few more days to consider your proposal." He replied as he sat back into his chair, giving me that same dead pan stare he'd always worn. My smile twitched in frustration as I pulled my hand back.
I turned my head before rolling my eyes, out of concern that he'd draw his sword and behead me or something. But I knew one thing in my heart.
I quickly turned around and slammed my hand on the stack of papers again. "You know, with all due respect, Your Highness, I really expected that a man of your valour and prestige would be a lot kinder." Putting knowing emphasis when I address him. "Getting a Lady's hopes up when she lowers her pride to propose to you, which is completely out of the societal norms, making her wait days for a response, only to receive none, then have her come down here to tell her that you need MORE time, is—without a doubt—quite insanely disrespectful and ungentlemanly."
As treasonous as that was, I refuse to chase after a man when that was my downfall in the first place.
Out of fear that anymore outbursts would get my head cut off prematurely, I gathered my ego that was spilled all over the floor, "Thank you for your time, Your Highness." I curtsied and turned to leave.
I'll have to find someone else quickly.
A sudden hand grabbed mine, holding me back, but not forcefully. "Wait." His deep voice cut through the tension in the air. I took in a deep breath and turned to face him, looking down at this hand inquisitively. His actions had dawned on him, so he pulled his hand back quickly. After what felt like forever on him scanning my face, I raised my eyebrows at him in a way to question him.
"I accept your proposal." He sat back down in his chair and resumed his work.
This man was testing me. Though I didn't know about what, weirdly enough, he seemed pleased with my response.
I stared at him, searching through his face for any information on what he was thinking. "You... accept..?" I clarified, on the off chance I hear him incorrectly.
"I will have my father announce the union as soon as possible," This statement was in place of the simple confirmation that I was looking for. "I hope you do not need any further time to handle affairs, as we will try to hold the ceremony sooner, rather than later." He walked in front of me and placed his hand on the door handle. As I walked over to the door, expecting him to open the door and throw me out, he hesitated, as if he had more to say.
"Your Highness?" I looked at his face that stared at the doorknob in his hand.
"After we are wedded, I have one condition that you must comply with." His eyes finally met mine, but they held a dark look in them, but if I wasn't mistaken, they almost looked yearnful.
My thoughts were moving fast about what he could possibly want from me. Was he going to ask to separate after a year? Maybe my father's business? Or maybe that he can take multiple women? "W-What condition?" I nervously chewed the loose skin on my bottom lip.
"If we get married," He paused, making my blood pressure rise.
"It's real, and not just a hoax behind closed doors."