"Bakayaro! Didn't we agree that you'd bring us in here to pursue love? Why has it turned into an execution assembly in the end!"
Clad in swim trunks and smelling like a brewery, Yamamoto had heroically managed to protect his "little bird" through desperate resistance.
However, sitting on the curb of the water park, the more he thought about it, the angrier he got. Finally, he stood up and pointed at the silent majority, ranting: "Liars! Do you have no heart of tolerance for the success of others?!"
"A guy who tried to sneak into the girls' locker room has no right to say that!"
"Chikusho! I already put in the effort to tie twin tails and I even got kissed! Why am I not qualified to enter the girls' locker room!"
Kneeling piteously on the ground, his thick arms pounding the stone pavement, Yamamoto Shinichirou forced two lines of aggrieved tears from eyes that weren't much larger than his junk.
"Your understanding of women is far too narrow!"
"Shut up, Yamamoto. If you want to hit on girls, do it honorably. Being a freak is useless."
Miyazawa Yuu spread one hand helplessly while covering his face with the other to prevent the disdainful glares Yamamoto was attracting from reflecting onto himself. He continued with an unfriendly gaze.
"By the way! I remember you have a prior record, don't you? Maybe we should just confiscate this Late Sapiens' criminal tools..."
"Sorry, Yu-senpai! From now on, I will definitely be an honorable person!"
He performed an instant dogeza, nodding his head in a sincere apology. Painful memories flooded Yamamoto's mind like bitter wine, but he had no choice but to swallow this grievance.
Back when he was a fresh-faced youth, he had simply confessed to a fairy-like older sister on the street, only to be kidnapped by a muscular beast that lunged out and nearly fed him to sharks.
Being tied to a fishing rod, with a scumbag behind him constantly slicing fresh beef to draw blood while a hammerhead shark hungered for fat beneath his butt—that was a sensation he didn't want to experience a second time!
"Alright! The trial of Yamamoto ends here!"
Nojima Hajime rested his chin on his hands, hiding his eyes in the shadow of his long hair. With a wave of his hand, he declared a temporary pardon for Yamamoto's crimes.
One had to remember that now was not the time for infighting. The key issue was that they had spent a ton of money!
He had even developed a psychological shadow regarding his beloved Elena. What exactly did they need to do to find girlfriends amidst the fun to compensate for these losses?
"Eh? What does that have to do with us?"
"Exactly. For guys like Yamamoto and Nojima, not finding a girlfriend is the norm, isn't it?"
"Oh? Is that so!?"
An eerie red light flickered beneath his bangs. Nojima Hajime slowly pulled a full set of ropes from his waistband and tied them to a large rock he found in the flowerbed.
Slap slap!
"Come here, Iori. Help me test if this rope is sturdy. I heard this brand has almost no negative reviews!"
"Hiss... why is it me again? Kohei had a hand in it too, right!"
"Nonsense!"
Standing in a row in front of Iori with terrifying scumbag smiles, the scumbag trio shouted in unison: "Of course it's because you're the one randomly reducing the denominator!"
"2/139?"
"Mm! Suddenly, I feel that helping our comrades find girlfriends is indeed very necessary!"
Thanks! I feel threatened!
Instantly changing his tune, Kitahara Iori held his chin and turned serious, his brain racing. Yet, he couldn't think of a single way to make a scumbag popular!
In the end, he hadn't even figured out why Chisa had agreed to pretend to be his girlfriend, let alone acting as a love mentor for others.
But with the scumbags watching him like hawks, waiting for a plan, he had to say something...
"Hey, Yu, Kohei! Do you guys have any ideas?"
As if he could produce a plan! Shifting the blame was definitely more appropriate. Compared to himself, he was much more willing to trust Yu and Kohei's wisdom!
However, when he turned to look...
"Wow! You must be Mr. Ikegoshi! We watched your variety show; it was truly amazing!"
"Um..."
"Can we take a photo? You can definitely take a photo, right? Look at those beautiful abs and that face! Ah! I can't take it!"
"No, I really am not Ikegoshi!"
Surrounded by two young girls, Imamura Kohei's social anxiety flared up. Even though they were his favorite "little sister" type, they were so enthusiastic that he had no idea how to handle them.
More importantly, he really wasn't that dog Ikegoshi. If he were identified, he'd definitely be treated as a bastard who toys with feelings!
"Mm-hmm! No problem, you definitely aren't Mr. Ikegoshi~"
With hearts practically leaping from their eyes, the seventeen-year-old girls clearly took Kohei's denial as the reserve of a celebrity. They nodded repeatedly, indicating they would never tell!
In exchange, however, they would just have to enjoy this shy idol themselves!
This overflowing masculinity and the unique reserve of an otaku were just so powerful—so powerful!
"..."
Everything went black before his eyes. Kitahara Iori felt his fists clench. It had only been a few minutes and Kohei had already hooked up with girls!
As for the other side...
"Young man, you're quite well-built. How about coming to play with Big Sister over there? (English)"
"Hehehe~ Look at all this collagen. You must taste delicious. Big Sister will satisfy your every request! (English)"
"Ah... sorry, I already have a partner here. (English)"
Struggling to deal with the red-haired, freckled beauties beside him, Miyazawa Yuu smiled and pointed toward the locker rooms, indicating he was here with others and couldn't pair up.
However, the two foreign beauties were clearly here in Japan for some fun and had mistakenly taken him for someone in a "special profession." Even though he said that, they were unwilling to give up.
"How many people are they? How much are they paying? We'll give you more as long as we have fun! (English)"
"That's right! There are only two of us here; it won't be too tiring~ Slurp! (English)"
"It's not a matter of price; the main thing is that I really don't provide that kind of service... (English)"
Though he had a smile on his face, Miyazawa Yuu was cursing internally. "Won't be too tiring"? Looking at how these two were looking for a "Happy" time on vacation, they were probably specifically out for a wild ride!
Please take that kind of thing to Southeast Asia. Although he had two girlfriends, he really didn't provide that business.
Most importantly, what was with that long tongue? It gave off the distinct vibe of wanting to drain a person dry!
"Hmm... is that so? Japanese boys have a shy cherry blossom scent. I thought you guys liked the 'forced' type... (English)"
"We'll book you next time if we're lucky! (English)"
"If possible, please don't..."
The troublesome figures finally left. Miyazawa Yuu breathed a sigh of relief and stretched his neck, finally daring to let down the guard over his "little brother."
However, almost seamlessly, four or five hands landed on his shoulders simultaneously.
Exhausted, he had no choice but to turn and look. He saw the scumbag group, along with Iori, all wearing explosive, constipated expressions of "all-you-can-eat sour lemons."
"If those were particularly sweet oranges you wanted to give me, I absolutely wouldn't eat them!"
"Orange your ass! What were you saying to those foreign beauties just now! Why were there no subtitles! Don't you know I only watch videos with subtitles!"
"I don't want to know about that weird fetish."
Expressionlessly closing his eyes to endure Yamamoto's spit-storm, Miyazawa Yuu pushed away the ugly face shoved in front of him, only for another to immediately take its place. They were clearly not going to give up until they got an answer!
After several attempts, he completely abandoned the childish idea of brushing them off. He extended a finger and explained with a headache: "You know how back when the Japanese economy was amazing, people would often go abroad for vacation, right?"
"That's true. I think it was our grandfathers' generation?"
"You can view the current situation as retribution for excessive consumption. It seems I was mistaken for service staff and they were trying to place an order."
Pulling a bill—distinct from yen—from the back of his trunks, Miyazawa Yuu casually gave it to Nojima. "Be a good boy, go buy some candy. Don't disturb an adult reflecting on life."
"You make it sound so nice, but weren't you just 'ordered'? Sniff! I'm not jealous at all!"
Despite saying that, Nojima Hajime snatched the banknote away. After all, it was something just taken from a big sister's personal pocket; no sense in letting it go to waste!
But Yu and Kohei really were enviable. Even just sitting still, they could attract a whole wave of high-quality women like bees to honey!
"In the end, only you are the best, Iori!"
Gritting his teeth, he grabbed Iori's hand. By comparison, Iori—who was only occasionally despised by Chisa and wasn't particularly prominent aside from being a scumbag—was the one who could best hang out with scumbags like them!
"Chotto matte. Being categorized with things like you makes me feel like I'm being insulted!"
Looking with "dot-eyes" at the trash gathered around him seeking validation, Kitahara Iori didn't want to be associated with people like Nojima either. It felt like a total downgrade!
Unfazed by Iori's disgust, Yamamoto Shinichirou gripped his other hand tightly, his eyes turning serious as he wiped his nose: "Good brothers! For life! Stay single with us forever!"
"The Unremarkable Alliance!"
"I already told you, who wants to be with you guys!"
"Eh? Are you Mr. Kitahara?"
Brushing the stray hairs from her forehead, Takahashi Aina bent down and bypassed the heavy blockade of scumbags, finally seeing clearly that the person surrounded in the middle was indeed Iori.
"What a coincidence! To think I'd run into you here!"
"Oh? A beauty I don't recognize at all. Iori, she seems to be looking for you!"
A slight glint of admiration flashed in his eyes, but Miyazawa Yuu suppressed it well in an instant.
He couldn't help it; a mature big sister type appearing out of nowhere—and one with a pair of beautiful legs completely different from Azusa-senpai or Nanaka-san—really made it hard for him to stay calm!
He simply looked away to keep his mind pure. Turning to look at Iori, who had been unexpectedly recognized but whose face was turning a bit purple from being squeezed by the scumbags, he suddenly understood.
"Ah... sorry, he's a bit busy 'dying' for the moment, so it's a bit inconvenient. May I ask if you're a student at Izu University? Or a guest of Grand Blue? I've never seen you before."
"Don't joke around, Mr. Yu. I'm Aina, the one who filmed the program at Dolphin just now!"
"Ha?"
"Eh?!"
Eyes met—nothing but total bewilderment!